Wanderings.

I was doing some research about Christian headcovering.  I was considering how many cultures wore them over time and the significances they had.  Ironically, they wore them at opposite times (i.e. not wearing them during Church as a sign of respect OR wearing them during church as a sign of humility).  So I decided to consider my own feelings on the topic and go from there.

My thoughts.  Which are very different from traditionalists on this, so be ready.  I decided in favor of trying the headcovering outside of church.  Now I'm not a particularly modest, quiet, or reserved person, so that wasn't it for me.  For me, I considered it a matter of chakras, or the Spiritual Anatomy of every person.  Caroline Myss has a wonderful book, called Anatomy of the Spirit, which connects the Buddhist chakra system with Judaic and Christian values.  Essentially, I was considering the Crown Chakra.  This is the chakra that connects us to God.  When you have a really good spiritual experience and you feel this floaty-tingle on the top of your head...that's the Crown Chakra.  When you see religious icons (of all faiths) with halos around their heads...that's the Crown Chakra.

Okay, so based on that, I thought to myself that it might be interesting to see what happened if I only had the Crown Chakra open (to good or bad) when I wanted it open to those messages and energies.  So I would be closing my chakra, symbolized by headcovering.  So I covered my head during the day, and left it open for God to communicate to me via dreams (i.e. Joseph, Jacob's son who dreamed prophetically of God and God's plan) and when I prayed. 

2 things happened:

1. I felt very disconnected from God for the span of the waking day.  Everything felt strange.  And that made sense, considering that I strongly believe that God is in everything, including the places and people you meet in your day-to-day.  That's backed up by Pagan belief and Christian belief.  It's like trying to bind up God in one place.  That doesn't make sense.
2. I had horrible nightmares.  Terrible dreams about natural disasters, lost family, you name it and I dreamt it.  It's like the Crown Chakra had to abruptly balance itself in my sleep.  And it had all kinds of energy to release and accept to the point that it made my mind crazy.

Needless to say, I'm not into headcovering as a religious path.  I am still a fan of fashion headcoverings, that aren't worn with the intent of "protecting" the Crown.  Things like headbands, bandannas, baseball caps.  But I'll never do that with religious intent again, lemme tell you what. 

I was raised in the ELCA (Evangelical Lutheran Church of America).  I say that loosely, because my mom went to Lutheran school through high school but stopped going to church much, and my dad converted to Lutheranism from Catholicism to marry her but was also not spiritually fervent.  I did go to Sunday school when I was very young, but have no conscious memories of having gone because I stopped when I was 5 or 6. 

I was always the one asking to go to church after that, and we went from time to time but never found anywhere that we connected to in a way that made us come back week after week.  But still, I felt God calling me.  Whoever He/She/They were.  But I'm getting ahead of myself.

When I was 13, I started looking for God again.  The Lutheran church I'd been attending didn't speak to me.  None of the Christian churches did.  I learned more about a lot of religions.  The one that interested me most was Paganism (or Neopaganism), not because it was cool or trendy but because I'd always felt that Church was imbalanced.  I love nature, and this honored it.  I felt home, and it matched.  God was speaking to me again.

I was not the most devoutly practicing Pagan (I didn't practice daily but practiced the major holidays and meditated fairly regularly).  But I definitely believed and it affected how I lived my life.  I studied a lot of New Age traditions, which are often revived old traditions. 

I'm 23 now, and am in the process of exploring my faith again.  I think that in the end, I will probably take pieces from multiple faiths and combine it to make my own personal relationship with the divine.

One belief that I have never doubted that there is an existence of the Ultimate.  I also know that the Ultimate is calling me to also challenge others to this personal relationship.  But before I can do that, I need to know what I believe and fully explore the breadth of religious experience and find what works for me.

Right now, I am fundamentally Pagan.  But I am currently fully delving myself into Christianity, to learn to understand it from the inside out.  I plan to do so with as many faiths as possible. 

I am currently attending UCC services on Sundays and Lutheran services on Tuesdays.  I am also following the ELCA's Read the Bible in One Year plan, utilizing the Amplified Bible and many margin notes.  By combining my understanding of the culture in which the Bible emerged (including polytheism and monolatry) and my background as a historian, I hope to understand the Hebrew Bible the way that the ancient Israelites would have understood it.  From there, I hope that will better understand the emergence and reaction to Christianity's rise. 

From this, I assume it must be clear but will say anyway that I believe that the Bible was intended as parables through which to understand how to act honorably.  I also believe that the Bible was divinely inspired but that since we are not gods in our own right, we must accept that years of oral transmission of the Biblical stories, combined with many translations and versions may have distorted God's intended message.  Reading between the lines for the underlying message is important.

With that background out of the way, I'm going to start sharing my thoughts here!   

What is worse? Ignorance or apathy?
Submitted by SavageBart.

Apathy.  Someone can be ignorant, but if they're apathetic you can't make them care enough to educate themselves.